Sticks and stones can break your bones, but words can break your heart.

"You're over-reacting." "Don't let it get to you." "Don't add to the drama." "Let it go, you're taking the whole thing too seriously." "Focus on what's important."

I find myself offering this advice to my oldest daughter quite frequently, usually late at night as we sit in her room, quitely discussing the latest drama-filled incident of her teenage life. Name calling, secrets, catty remarks - the soap opera of high school is real, but girls at this age are, and always have been, superb at inflating whatever was said into World War III. The possibility of letting it go is as unrealisitc as flapping your arms and taking flight. Not gonna happen.

I believe that hormones are to blame (I blame hormones on EVERYTHING in life) and I am so happy to be past all of the angst, drama and agony of those years.

Well, I thought I was past it.

Someone called me ignorant recently. IGNORANT. Dumb, uninformed, stupid, not smart. And I wasn't even talking to her! Or about her!

Do I sound like a high-school drama-queen yet? I feel like one, but I can't get over that word. I keep dreaming about it, and think about it in the car and in the shower. Nevermind that the person who called me that is, well, apparently not the sharpest...no, no no, I'm not calling anyone names. That would be STOOPING TO HER LEVEL, and I'm above that.

She has her own blog, you can check it out at http://mi...oops, I was THIS close to being a catty B. Not gonna do it. I want to, though. OH HOW I WANT TO. But then what will I say to my daughter the next time she is in the middle of something similar?

Forget it! I know what I'll say..."Egg her house, that'll teach her! No, have everyone you know write awful comments about her on her blog, where everyone else will see them and know that she is a bad, bad person. Make her sorry, make her wish she had never been born. Start a rumour about her. Put ink in her shampoo bottle. Slash her tires. Get her, GET HER GOOD!!!!!!!!"

Well, I do feel better :), although a bit passive/aggressive, and of course I'm not going to do any of those things. I don't roll like that. But I do think there is a lesson to be gained from all this, and what I've learned is this:

It really hurts when someone calls you names. Stick and stones, my ass. Name calling and girl-drama is real, and the next time D is hurting over something someone said about her, or to her, I'll be more sensitive. I won't roll my eyes at her or tell her to "get over it."

My best advice? Learn something from it, and grow. That is all we can do.

Of course, writing about it on your blog helps, too. I totally recommend that!